We're looking for new writers to join us!

The best of the 2009 News Roundup titles

by: Nathan -
More On: News Roundup
Dear reader, you may have noticed the nonsensical and oft bewildering sub-titles that accompany our News Roundup. While I understand your suspicions that these are the result of a million monkeys banging away at Mac Books, the truth is much more mundane. Each title is painstakingly crafted from the words included in the titles of the news posts being rounded up, often with hilarious results.

Randy Kalista was our resident news wrangler for a good half of the year. I took over when he went on hiatus to pursue other goals. While he and I take different approaches to the crafting of the News Roundup title one thing remains the same; they're gosh darn funny. Without further ado, here are the Gaming Nexus staff's top picks of News Roundup titles for 2009:

Marissa Meli
  1. exciting mini zombie
  2. microsoft promises darkest world shuffling
  3. Mario has our last darkside spank
  4. Mysterious NHL Zen Fortress
  5. The Last Baby Moon

Chad Smith
  1. Spock revealed there's A Penguin Hero hitting Sick Puppies in the cranks Building
  2. Darth Vader quietly invades Paris, holds it ransom for $8 million
  3. Dirty creepy Naughty gaming Zombies!
  4. City of Sinners and Saints and Devil Summoners
  5. Big Bang Afro Mafia

Sean Colleli
  1. Star Trek Dream Origins
  2. Dracula's Pirates Under Suspicion
  3. Godfather Nightmare Twister
  4. Sonic's Ultimate X-Blades
  5. DJ Max the Ripper vs. Sherlock Realms

Tina Amini
  1. Army of zombies helps kids with Conviction
  2. Razer mouse is dead but Bigfoot lives on
  3. Darth Vader quietly invades Paris, holds it ransom for $8 million
  4. Ninja abilities at brand new exspensive specials
  5. dirty creepy Naughty gaming Zombies! 

John Yan
  1. Witcher King to avenge 8 bit heroes
  2. Darh Vader quietly invades Paris, holds it ransom for $8 million
  3. dirty creepy Naughty gaming Zombies
  4. Broken Thief Sims
  5. F.E.A.R. H.A.W.X.

Randy Kallista
  1. Tickets out now for Murder cards
  2. Army of zombies helps kids with Conviction
  3. Ninja abilities at brand new expensive specials
  4. Big Bang Afro Mafia
  5. unclothed interview now with online multiplayer
  6. Brutal Wrestlemania Capitalism
  7. Mysterious NHL Zen Fortress
  8. Blood on the Sand beneath a Steel Sky
  9. Witcher King to avenge 8-bit Heroes
  10. Can I Really Be the Godfather?
Nathan Murray
  1. No Dedicated Servers for Call for Duty Modern Warfare 2 gives your Spirit Rage
  2. Brutal Wrestlemania Capitalism
  3. Imagine Clive Barker's Graveyard
  4. Galactic Badass of The Sponge World
  5. unclothed interview now with online multiplayer
  6. Natal expansion talks practically Serious
  7. Demigod CrimeBusters
  8. Crystal Mac is mysterious: available for free
  9. They Might Be Galactrix
  10. LittleBigBangMini
I would like to thank all the staff that participated and a special thanks to Mr. Kalista for all of the hard work he did for the site this year. I would also like to thank you, the reader, for reading and enjoying what we at Gaming Nexus work so hard to produce.