Rule Five – Learn to Fake Interest (some more)
It’s actually pretty easy to learn how to fake interest, and better yet, you can probably get your girlfriend to help you with it! Just sit her down and start rambling about why Super Mario Brothers 3 was superior to Donkey Kong Country … even though Donkey Kong looked better. Or maybe it’s time to explain to her exactly how a wireless control works, or why the Power Pad wasn’t a good Nintendo accessory.
Now, if you don’t have a girlfriend, or that suggestion doesn’t apply to you, you can pick up a copy of Stephen Hawking’s book, A Brief History of Time
, turn to page 48, and start reading the second paragraph to just about anybody. You won’t have to read it for too long, just long enough to study their reaction. Hopefully they’ll respond with what I like to call, fake interest.
Once mastered, fake interest can be used to stay away from the American Idol booth or the the booth babes that have nothing but their underwear on (trust me, that girlfriend we talked about isn’t going to want to see pictures of those booths). Hopefully this will get you out of the bad E3 experiences with a little more time to find good games to play.
Games like SOCOM II, which did a great job of fixing almost every problem I had with the first game. Or Downhill Dominance from the makers of Twisted Metal Black, a racing game that was quite a bit better than I expected. Or there’s always Final Fantasy X-2 and Star Ocean III, both of which looked extremely sharp. There is no time for games and people you have no interest in, there are simply hundreds of titles worth looking at and playing.
Here we are talking about the good games again … I’ve yet again crashed this rule. Instead of moving on to a new rule, I think it’s time to head back to the motel, look through the good stuff I collected at the expo, and get some much-needed rest. Tomorrow will bring us day two, new challenges, and even a few surprises we won’t have to fake anything around. But for now, it’s time to fall asleep while watching a rerun of Oprah.
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